From The Crucible (by Pastor Linda Pugsley)

"If you fail to plan, you plan to fail!" Boy, somehow that saying ended up deeply set into my inner framework. I'm a calendar and schedule nut! Now, I don't mean that you shouldn't write things down and follow through. Heck, I get requests for speaking engagements all the time or have counseling appointments or meetings at certain dates and times, so I better write down a thing or two. No, I'm talking about being a slave to your schedule and not leaving room for flexibility with God' schedule. I find myself in a quandary sometimes. My calendar is made up weeks ahead of time (remember, I'm the calendar control freak – or was!). So I have the schedule all neatly laid out; a masterful weave of both personal and ministry tasks. Oh, so doable...until...oh, oh, the doorbell rings and there is an unexpected visitor, maybe even one in deep spiritual need. Yes, I would seek God to tend to this precious soul, but for years, as I was serving in that moment of time, it was under great stress and pressure. My heart and soul were dealing with the individual but my head was screaming "You don't have time for this! You are now way behind; wrap it up, wrap it up!"

Do you know what a pressure cooker that is? I'm in God's flow of the moment but fenced in by the dictates of "my plan". What a hellish existence. It has taken a long time to break that cycle and it's not all gone yet. So what can you do when this happens to you, too? Well, I hear God saying, "Relax, enter My rest"; and yet I'm still pulling out my hair to "re-do" the calendar. I don't want to be tense or anxious but I find I am sometimes. But by God's grace I really, really have come to understand the huge amount of time I've wasted in my obsessive type of planning and that causes an even further crunch on my time frames. I kind of forget to lean on Him like when He tells us in Psalm 32:8, "I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you and watch over you". I read that and go, "Duh – I know that".

So, it's not so much knowing as going further on to the doing of it. It works! Though not yet perfected in this "letting go of the schedule" thing, I am so much more relaxed and able to enter His rest. So, it’s not me being better at resting; no, it's me being better at not being me! God's flow through me, and you, actually brings rest and then wisdom on how to best deal with the changes. Come on guys, dive in, and don’t be afraid. God does know how best to run your life – and your schedule. Go for it! Endure the fire...it's producing pure gold!

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